Mary Poppins

When I was a youngster my favorite movie was Mary Poppins. Partly because it was one of the first movies I had seen IN THE MOVIE THEATER. But perhaps more significant was that my cousin Marilyn took me, just me, on a special date to go see it. Marilyn was really my Dad’s cousin, a generation and half older than me and she looked like a movie star. She loved kids and was the pied piper to most of them. I was the third child of four with a new baby sister. I tended to get lost in the shuffle in terms of priority. Marilyn always made me feel like I was the special one. I guess I got confused at some point and started calling Marilyn, Poppins. (Mary, Marilyn – it all sounded the same to my little ears.)

Poppins was my idol, my mentor-of-sorts throughout my life. My very first airplane trip alone was at 13 years old and I went to visit Poppins for Easter week. It’s a difficult age for girls and she was a role model for me – she was such a ‘girl.’ I remember I picked her as my sponsor when I completed my Confirmation. I stayed in touch and visited almost every year. She used to give me her hand me down clothes. Can you imagine? It was like getting hand me downs from a celebrity. Some of the coolest outfits I ever wore belonged to Poppins first. She always made me feel like I was the special one.

Marilyn died of pancreatic cancer in 2001. It was devastating to me on many levels. I didn’t have first-hand experience with cancer, let alone, the deadliest – pancreatic. I was there in the room when she passed away. It was the one of the most important moments in my life. It was indescribable in the sense that I was overwhelmed and have never felt with more certainty, that ‘everything is going to be okay.’ I felt safe. It was not what I expected to feel. It was clear to me then (and harder to recall now that it’s far away) that there is something bigger than this and there is no need to worry. I flew to her home when I got the news that she was nearing the end. She died about 2 hours after I got there. Her husband, three children and ME were in the room. I am forever humbled that I was included in that room. Always hesitant to speak up, I had a crucial moment where I realized – if I don’t say something now, I’ll never, ever get another chance to say it. I whispered in her ear, sobbing – I love you, Poppins. I’ll always remember her turning and looking directly at me. She was unable to talk at that stage – but her eyes said everything. She always made me feel like I was the special one.

When my daughter was about 4 or 5 years old, my sister and I took her on a girl’s trip to Disneyland. WOO HOO! We made a special reservation to have tea with Mary Poppins. It was held in an oversized conference room in one of the Disney hotels. The room had been transformed into an old English tea house – complete with tea tables, china cabinets, chandeliers, old-fashioned sofas – absolutely perfect.

We anxiously awaited Mary Poppins arrival. We sipped our tea and ate our Mickey Mouse-shaped blueberry scones. The music started, a soundtrack played of birds chirping. And there she was…she floated out in full Mary Poppins attire, complete with a parasol, singing a spoonful of sugar (to be honest, I’m not even sure that was the song – I was starstruck). My daughter eyes were shining in amazement and she was starstruck, too. I have never fought back tears harder than in that moment. I couldn’t hold it in. I looked at my sister. She knew. She understood.

That was and ever will be one of the most poignant moments of my life.

Main Entry: poi·gnant
2 a (1): painfully affecting the feelings : piercing (2): deeply affecting